What? Did you think I’d forgotten about you? No, no, this was all a very clever test to see if you could cope without me. Clearly not. Look at the state of you!
Well, fear not loyal readers, I return with both half-assed pictures and irrelevant text. Yes my friends, you shall be free to bathe in my glory once more. Though, to be quite honest with you, I don’t actually remember how I went about doing any of this. I had a little routine you see, healthy one, like cigarettes after sex with strangers, that sort of thing but I’ve only gone and forgotten it.
We shall have to pray that I remember as I type because there is no stopping this crazy blog/train of mine dear friends, oh no. Partly because I sold several parts of the train in order to buy a big hat because I thought I was going to the horse races but I don’t even like horse races so I didn’t go and now I have big hat that I hate and have no intention of ever wearing and a train without breaks that isn’t even a train anyway, it’s a blog. That was all lies and I am very sorry for my dishonesty, I will never do it again.
Did you ever have to write an apology letter in school? I had to write a couple, was pretty lame, mostly because I was never actually sorry.
Here is a picture of me.
I call this look “No, really it was an accident, my knees are bleeding, I better have another one of those cool plasters” Did anyone else get hurt on purpose when they were little just for plasters? I had cool dinosaur plasters once, never bled so much in my life. Also, you silly Americans call them band-aids? So silly.
I obviously love this dress. Black and white stripes? You can’t see me right now but my keyboard is on the floor because I am bent over, offering myself to this dress like a bitch in heat. There’s a mental image for you. It hasn’t taken the offer yet but I’m sure it’s only a matter of time, probably had a big lunch or something, I can relate, had four poptarts. Four! Absurd!
Skin. Sugar Garden.
This is Hope, I think it’s still my favorite Sugar Garden skin in any tone. I tried the newest one but I don’t think it really suits me.
Oh Lamb. Much like an actual lamb, you make me tingle in special places. Also, I hear you are delicious with mint sauce. I have never eaten a lamb or tasted mint sauce and I have no intention of doing so. Fear not, you are among friends dear Lamb.
I’ve never eaten a pumpkin either. Well, I had pumpkin pie once when I was really little and I remember really liking it but I haven’t had any actual pumpkin. Anyway, pumpkins make nice dresses, who knew?
u.f.o make pretty things. These were from a gacha and all gacha machines hate me for some reason, probably racism or something. Anyway, I love them!
Headband. Also u.f.o.
I spent well over 5k on the gacha machines at u.f.o trying to get this headband and a kitty doll. I still don’t have that doll. Gacha hates me.
I’ve spoken about Gos heels in the past, they’re great, I noticed today though that sometimes the skin tone looks ever so slightly off. It’s still way easier to just click a button on a hud than to actually tint them though so I really can’t complain.
I think that’s everything.
So, what do you think about my return to blogging? Was it as triumphant as you hoped it would be? It was actually way harder than I thought it would be, I regret taking a break now. I’m sure this isn’t my best work but if you look at every other post you’ll note that the bar was never set very high and then you will feel much, much better about this post. If that fails I recommend red wine and possibly an attitude adjustment, you ungrateful bastards!
Pepsi was really cheap so I bought like, four bottles because it’s been hot here. I am so sick of Pepsi. It tastes of syrup. Syrup and shame. Syrup, shame and an early grave. So now I’m drinking fruit juice which is apparently also bad for you. Why is every drink trying to kill me? Red wine still loves me at least. I have no doubt that if red wine had hands it would hold my hair back as I threw it back up along with two bagel, four poptarts, scrambled eggs and baked beans. I pretty much only eat breakfast food these days. I regret nothing.
Anyway, I’m going to go, got things to do, can’t be pissing about with you all night can I?
Good luck with that rash, catch you later, yeah?